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Plays, 1st May 2016 -

Ah, embargoes. For the past three days I've been playing one of the hottest games on the planet, and I'm not even allowed to tell you what it is. Which sucks, obviously, but worry not: you can read The Words and watch The Videos on it next week. Or just pop into CEX and buy it, probably.

What else? Hitman, of course. What a cracker. One of the best missions in the entire series, World of Tomorrow – and the coastal town, Sapienza, which houses it – is a beautiful mixture of sun-soaked escapism and sly killing. Which is what I want from all of my holidays. There's more to do in this one map – thanks to its size, density, and the sheer amount of challenges (and how inventive they are) than most other full games I've played this year. You'll be playing this one for ages.

Sorry, what? Listen, no. I can't tell you what the other game is. Don't worry about it. It'll be over soon.

It's been a bit of a mixed bag this week as I balance the dreary, deathly tone of Dark Souls 3 with the bright and cheery attitude of Ratchet & Clank. But it's Hitman's second episode that's gotten me excited the most. There's almost too much space to explore; the size of Sapienza seemingly less a level and more a PS2-gen-size open world. It's great, though, and much like Paris I feel like I've barely scratched the surface an hour or so in. And with the three-day weekend ahead of us, I can see myself losing plenty more to it.

I've nearly finished going through Dark Souls 3 for the guides, which is good because my growing disdain and frustration with it is now seeping into the guides themselves. Not even as subtext, just actual text text. Luckily Tom can't legislate what I do in my free time, so last weekend I traded in Bloodborne and Dark Souls 2 and got the new Ratchet and Clank, which is a more enjoyable game than both those games I just mentioned. Suck it, FromSoft.

Ratchet and Clank is another game I played as a child (being approximately 12 on the original game's release) and is one of the first things I remember playing on the PS2. The reimagined version that's out now is just like the original, but better. I'm not sure what else to say about it. You're a weird little cat creature with a robot friend. You jump around different coloured planets hitting stuff. It's fun and all the guns do stupid things. Bolts and screws are currency. It's a simpler world.

Other than that I'm still working on the crowdsourced Inquisitor for Dragon Age: Inquisition, although progress has stalled a little due to me being time poor at the moment. Also everyone voted for the Inquisitor to romance The Iron Bull and then voted for decisions that The Iron Bull doesn't approve of, and we all know full well that you can't have sex with someone without their approval.

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